Hi Honey I’m home – Sitting sober on cloud nine is back in the building!!

Where do I start, its been a while since my last blog, convincing myself that I do not have a drinking problem because I don’t drink everyday and because there are so many people out there that drink way more than I do.

Well the fact is I do have a drinking problem. My problem is that I know drinking makes me feel like crap, it makes me tired, stressed and agitated and yet I still do it!! WHY?????

I use the excuse that it helps me to relax, but I know that’s bullshit!!! It’s the wine that is making me stressed in the first place, not to mention making me fat and lazy to boot.

No matter how many times I say “I’m going to stop drinking once and for all” I always seem to end up back in the same place….me sat on my sofa, drinking red wine. It never used to be more than a bottle, but more recently that one bottle has turned into two. which is really scary!!!!

As I sat heavily in my hangover yesterday, unable to do all the things I had intended to do, I knew that something has to change. So I am back here in blog writing mode starting my journey to sitting sober on cloud nine once more, hoping that this time will be the last time I have to start over.

My plan is to go back to the gym and start working out again. I’m going to make sure I am treating my body with the respect that it deserves because when I eat the right food, exercise and mediate, I feel amazing…my body needs this!! I need this!!!

To help me stay on track I am going to get back to writing regular blogs about how great life is when you are Sitting SOBER on Cloud Nine.

See you soon L xxx

Parenting is not easier with wine!!!

Last night after a productive day in the office, I left work and made my way to school, to pick up my children. I’d had a good day and I was feel pretty blooming happy. I was looking forward to my seeing my two babies and finding out what they had been up to all day.

The school pick up went smoothly. I got two lovely cuddles and bonus for me they approved of my plans for dinner that evening (chicken fajitas). They didn’t even fight about who was going to sit in the front seat of the car. WINNER!

What could possibly go wrong???

We enter the house and Elliott runs out into the back garden to get his bike, he then proceeds through the house with his bike, making his way towards the front door. “Where are you going?” I ask, “out to play” replied Elliott. “You have a swimming lesson in half an hour, go and get your swimming kit ready“. (His brother at this time is up stairs getting his swimming kit ready as we had been discussing swimming lessons in the car journey home from school, so it wasn’t as if he wasn’t aware).

I can literally see the anger rise up from Elliott’s feet to his face as he turns bright red and lets out a god awful scream. A scene I see all to often and always reminds me of the incredible hulk, when he rips through his clothes and turns green. Elliott drops his bike to floor and starts jumping up and down on the wheel, like something you would see in a cartoon. He is screaming at me “I want to go out and play, I don’t want to go swimming” .

I’m sure it will come as no surprise to hear our pet name for Elliott is ‘Wreck it Ralph’!!!

I calmly tell him I will phone the pool and check his swimming lesson is still going on. While I am on the phone, Elliott is still throwing a tantrum, kicking his bike, the door the walls. Turns out his lesson has actually been double booked.

HOORAHHH!!!! End up tantrum right?……….WRONG!!!!

I try to tell him his lesson has been cancelled, so he can go out, but he can’t hear me because he is screaming to loud. I lose my temper and send him up to his room to get changed and to calm down.

Big mistake sending him up stairs!!! Innocently getting his swimming gear together, Bradley (Elliott’t brother) has now become Elliott’s new target.

3, 2, 1

MMMMUUUUUMMMMM!!!!! ARRRRRRGGGGHHHH Elliott’s just…….. I can’t hear what he is saying because he is crying, but I am betting Elliott has just done to Bradley what he was just doing to his bike.

I march up stairs and send them both to their rooms, telling them they are grounded. Bradley screams “I didn’t do anything” and slams his door on me. Elliott just screams!!!!

Now, this is the part where I rejoice at the fact I no longer drink, because since giving up the booze, I no longer turn into an angry Mummy who shouts and screams because she has lost control of the situation. I don’t scream at the kids to stay out of my sight because I have had enough. I don’t march back downstairs in need of a glass of wine so I can calm down.

Instead I stop, I breath and think about how I can turn this situation around. I walk into Bradley’s room and tell him he is not grounded and that I made mistake. Bradley is happy!!!

I now just need to control Elliott!!

Elliott at this point is in his room trashing the place, or at least that’s what it sounds like. I sit and wait for him to come out. He has worked himself into such a state he can’t even talk. I tell him to come and have a cuddle and calm down. He tries to talk but he is crying to hard, I tell him to be quiet, just to give mummy a cuddle and calm down. I give him a huge hug and tell him I love him, but his behaviour has been unacceptable. I tell him he is grounded so he is not going out to play, but he can come and help me with dinner if he likes. (Elliott loves helping me in the kitchen). Elliott is now happy!!

5 minutes later, we are in the kitchen cutting up vegetables for dinner and talking about our days. As I stand there, I suddenly become very proud of myself. Situations like this one, happen a lot in my house. I have two children who fight like cat and dog daily. I used to drink wine to cope with the stress of being a parent, but the fact is I cope so much better without it!!!!

A health magazine said that?????

Today I read an article in a health magazine which has really annoyed me. The article in question was printed in a well known health and wellness magazine, which is read by thousands of people. This month it features a Working Mum asking the following question….

I don’t think I drink to much, but I often use wine as a reward after work. Could this affect the way my kids view alcohol’?

The reason I am so annoyed is because I see myself in this woman. I knew for 6 whole years I didn’t have a good relationship with alcohol, but when I questioned my drinking with medical professionals, they would always say – just cut down, there is no need to quit. Exactly the same advice has been offered in this article today.

The fact is the sheer nature of alcohol and the fact it is an addictive drug makes it really hard to cut down, hence the reason why most people drink more now than they did 10 years ago.

Anyway Lets get back to the article and break that question down;

I don’t think I drink to much

Well she probably does and shes probably knows it, that is why she added that particular comment to her question. If she didn’t believe she drank to much, she wouldn’t have tried to justify her drinking, which is exactly what she did when she said…………………..

I often reward myself with wine after work

Alcohol is an addictive drug that causes thousands of deaths a year. Why on earth would anyone reward themselves with such a thing. Alcohol is only good for 4 things. It is an anaesthetic, a detergent, an antiseptic and a fuel.

It DOES NOT have any health benefits…FACT!!!!

It DOES NOT cure stress, it DOES NOT make you more confident, It will NOT help you relax or have fun. It offers you NO joy or support at all!!

Any benefits you think you are getting from alcohol are all due to the brain washing you have received about alcohol from a young age. Brainwashing that starts during childhood, watching your parents drinking habits.

So in answer to your question

Could this affect the way my kids view alcohol?

YES of course it will!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I work with a lovely girl called Rachael, we often go for coffee together and put the world to rights. One day we were talking about why I’d decided to stop drinking and we got onto the subject of her drinking habits. It turned out she hardly ever drinks because she doesn’t like it. Her parents were against drinking so it wasn’t something she was ever bothered about.

Now lets look at me, I used to drink every weekend. I don’t remember my parents ever getting drunk or drinking every night, but I definitely remember them drinking at social occasions where we would all have lots of fun. On one particular occasion (I think in may have been New Years Eve) An assault course was set up in the living room and we all got in teams and raced remote control cars around the living room. It was great fun, as a result I grew up thinking alcohol is fun.

The woman in this article drinks wine as a reward after work, In other words, she drinks wine to relax and relieve stress.

I’ve said it before and I am sure I will say it again.

Alcohol does not relieve stress or relax you. It causes stress and anxiety. She is basically teaching her children that their problems can be solved with alcohol.

The Wellbeing expert in this article replied “It is important for your kids to see you enjoy a healthy relationship with alcohol”

There is no such thing as a healthy relationship with alcohol because it is an addictive drug with no health benefits what so ever.

People drink because they have been brain washed into believing they get some kind of joy or support from alcohol. The brainwashing comes from adverts, television and people around us. That brainwashing starts when when we are children

If you don’t want your children to drink alcohol. Don’t drink in front of them, or better still, just don’t drink.